The New Navy

Somehow I found myself on Wikipedia looking at Operation Praying Mantis. I was part of it, I was a Corpsman for VF-213, which is now called VFA-213, the Blacklions. So I figured I'd look up the squadrons of friends I had back then. Jerry Andris' VF-114 Aardvarks are no more. And Mike Tulley's VAW-117 Nighthawks are now called Wallbangers... what a fucking stupid name. They're called the Wallbangers now yet they have the same insignia, a bird flying among the moon and stars. Well, to me it looks more like a bald headed eagle, but that's closer to what a Nighthawk would look like that whatever the a fucking Wallbanger is or might look like.

Crazy times. For a while I'd maybe get an hour or two of rest during work days. I'd only get sleep on weekends and when I had duty because I'd go visit my girlfriend after work and we'd be up all night.

Mike Tulley and Jerry Andris... I know I probably annoyed them at times, but we had some really good times. The drunkest I've ever been in my life was while we were in Fallon (piece of shit town) Nevada. I hate Fallon, what kind of idiot do you have to be to willingly live there? Well I'll tell you, drunk, because there's nothing else to do there except drink. Well, it may be different now, but I still hate the place because while I was just trying to pass out/rest my eyes in the back of the car, a couple of Fallon's finest came upon me and decided to get me out of the car and to the police station. I didn't cause any trouble, I didn't do anything except, be under age. doh! I was in the Navy and too young to buy a beer, yet totally drunk out of my gord.

You see, Jerry and Mike were in there 20s already so they knew their limits, what to do to keep from puking I guess since they never puked. And we were in the bar drinking pitchers of beer, and in between the pitchers we'd do shots. We drank all the Shnappes they had, all the good kinds anyway, fuck peppermint, and the bar tender told us he had something new for us, that he'd let each of us try a shot of for free. We're like, sure! He goes to his little freezer and pulls out the bottle telling us, "It's called Jaegermeister." Yeah, it's common now, back then it was just making its debut and starting a reputation. So we take a shot, and we're like, more!

I'm not sure if we drank it all, we probably did. But the next thing I know is that I'm pretty fucking drunk and feel a puke coming on. To Mike helps me out and I go outside and puke alongside a telephone pole or something, who knows. I'm surprised I didn't pass out and have acute alcohol poisoning. But if I had, I knew I'd be ok because my two friends were good corpsmen too. Mike helped me in the car and I was happy to be resting my eyes.

So now I'm at the police station. They put me in a chair in some hall outside their main little office. I didn't know it at the time, but I'm sure they were videotaping me. Luckily for me I'm not an asshole when I'm drunk, so I just sat there quietly. I guess they got bored and realized I wasn't going to incriminate myself, and what do ya know, shore patrol comes in. Great. Keep in mind I've been in handcuffs since they took me out of the car. Shore patrol puts on their own handcuffs and takes me back to the base, where once again I'm put in a chair and wait. Nobody talked to me or anything, they did their own thing, playing cards all night long. Great job shore patrol. Anyway, they finally take the handcuffs off in the morning and tell me I need to report to my Master Chief Petty Officer [tangent - wish I could remember his name, he seemed like he was one of those people who could either be your best friend or worst enemy. Lucky for me, we talked for a while when I first reported to the squadron and reminded me of my grandpa. When he'd come to Medical I'd make sure he didn't get any BS and helped any way I could. One time on the boat, a senior chief got on my case unfairly, so I went and griped to my master chief about it. Holy crap, I didn't know he'd come down to Medical and verbally bitch slap the senior chief. They came out the senior chief's office and I could tell he was not a happy camper. That guy NEVER said anything cross to me EVER again. I could tell he wanted to though, but he didn't. I wish I could remember his name too, I'm sure he was just having a bad day and here I am, some punk kid, what the hell did I know? He had the same last name as an actor that popular at the time... anyway...].

So I go to him and he's a little upset, not too much though, to be honest I really don't remember to what degree except I know he wasn't spitting mad anyway. But ya know what, I never heard anything regarding that night from my squadron ever again. It was like it never happened. Come to think of it... maybe master chief saw to it that it never went any further. He was the best. Vickery? Something like that.

The worst person was the new flight surgeon, Menendez or something like that. What a cry baby. He complained about me, something I did or didn't do, I really don't know. They had me sign some shit while I was recovering from wisdom teeth removal and after some meeting. I really don't even know what was said or anything. I learned my lesson though, I've never let pieces of shit like him get over on me ever again. I'd have no problem putting him in his place now, if only I knew then what I know now. Oh well, shit happens, live and learn.

One person I know I bugged the hell out of was Morgan. Ty Morgan I think. We were in the same C school class and he was ship's company on the ship my squadron deployed on. Morgan, Stillion and I would go to the beach all the time while in C school. Stillion was ok except I will never forget him throwing my brand new knife at a door and the tip breaking off it. He never apologized, I think he said he wouldn't apologize because he was an atheist. Either way, pretty shitty of him, but other than that he was really cool. He had some hot chicks, that's for sure. Maybe that's how I got started on only dating hot chicks... who knows.

Weird how names start coming back... Aarowhead, Cherry, Bourne (reborn as one guy would say), Ridley or Riley... he was on duty when that guy came in one evening and died later that night, had to be one of the more gory deaths to look at. The guy who didn't see the propellers was kinda gory too, and we had the privilege of wiping down his bits and pieces off the plane, VAW-117's. Ah, Miller, from VA-95. He was really nice because he wrote up a letter of appreciation for me when I looked over his squadron during some picnic they had. I also woke him up one night so he could stick his finger up some guy's butt, because I certainly had never done it before and... come on, it's just gross. Yeah, good times.

Hehe, speaking of gross, there was the time we went to lunch and were talking shop. I don't even remember what were talking about but it was really nothing we considered to be in poor taste. But this guy comes over and asks us if we could not talk as loud or change the topic because he was trying to eat and we were grossing him out. Good times.

Stillion and I playing a practical joke on Morgan by forwarding time for him, on his watch and alarm, so that he goes and reports for duty an hour early... waking up some guy in the process and getting chewed out a little. Good times!

Guido and me throwing a frisbee around listening to Guns and Roses before their album was even out... his dad was some record company guy and sent Guido the tape asking what he thought about them. Guido was like, this rocks, from the very get-go. Close to year later, Morgan says to me, you gotta listen to this, you've never heard it before... it was Guns and Roses of course, and yeah, not only had I heard it before, I already knew what song I liked best on the tape. It was weird because we had been listening to it for so long and it was like, getting old, but everyone else was thinking it was so new.

Yeah good times were had, but there was a lot of shit too. And the only thing that made it all bearable was Watonka. Looking back, man I was an idiot for letting her go, for letting my mom influence me into letting her go. Now I have neither. Brilliant! Watonka has two kids now I think. If she got divorced, I'd want her again. I think so anyway... would we be so different now? My first true love. She's the best. Sometimes I still dream about her. Weird. I can still remember a vivid dream I had about her, we were in a house. Anyway, I guess love never does really die all the way out, proof of its power, the only thing immortal among mortals. I asked her to marry me, she said yes. I didn't have a ring... ugh. But damn I sure loved her. My mom said it was infatuation. But infatuation only lasts a month or so, I've since learned. It was powerful love because we were together almost a year and a half. I didn't know... damn me. Would that I could change what happened back then. If I could go back in time, I think I can now say that I would have gone back to San Diego or kept her with me in Houston. Either place, as long as I was with her. She's the only person who ever really knew everything about me. I told her absolutely everything about me that I know of. I only fed her some BS a couple of times, but I think she knew I was each time, but they were no big deal, I'm such a bad liar to begin with that I know I better not do anything too bad. Yeah... I'll always have love for her in my heart until I die. I'm sure if I die slowly enough, she'll be in my final thoughts. Yeah, I certainly can't say that about other women I've seen or the even fewer I've had love for. Certainly not Sheri, if I think of her in my final thoughts, it's because I'm having a heart attack and I'm thinking of how similar the pain is in the way we broke up. Of course, there's one other... but I can't even talk about it because it's incomplete, and likely always will be just that, even though I know it could be, or could have been, something just as powerful as what Watonka and I had. But that's just a guess, maybe a wish, it's something I'll never know. Maybe a better wish would be to have Watonka back, as unlikely as it seems.

When should treatment stop?

News 8 Austin | 24 Hour Local News | TOP STORIES: "Should it be up to hospitals to decide when treatment stops?"

There is a small child that is terminally ill, and treatment is only prolonging death. That's basically what the hospital is saying as the reason why they want to discontinue treatment, giving the family a couple of weeks to find a different hospital else they're going to "pull the plug" so to speak.

The real reason of course is money. A cost-benefit analysis by the hospital, maybe not called as much but the same, apparently has told them that the value of the boy over the time he's expected to live isn't worth the cost of maintaining or prolonging his life. And maybe they're right.

It's an ethics problem where money plays a huge role. If the treatment for prolonging his life until his death was inexpensive, then there would be no question, he'd live until he died in their care, and the family would be content that everything possible was done.

But, what if the child is suffering a lot of pain or some other turmoil, even though there is inexpensive treatment, or money was no object?

The mother says the hospital has no right to say when they'll stop treatment. Of course she's wrong as the law exists right now, but apparently there is legislation in the works that may change the rights of who can do what.

To me, it's a fairly easy determination since money is the crux. For the hospital, they must determine if they would be negligent if they discontinued life support. The good news is that there is already an equation to determine just that. They may thank Learned Hand for it. He says there is negligence when the burden is less than the probability of harm multiplied by the degree of loss (B < p x L).

However, even if there is no negligence of the part of the hospital, there can still be a harm when suffering is enters the equation. Thus for the parents, it would seem their equation might be there is negligence when the child's suffering is greater than probability of recovery multiplied by the degree of loss.

Also, there may be the issue of "death with dignity." Even if there is no suffering and no problem with costs, would it be more dignified to allow the child to die rather than living unconsciously with a constant dependency on machines?

Here, it appears that the cost to prolong the child's life must be fairly high and they probably know there is little to no chance of recovering those costs. Thus the hospital's burden is probably very high. The child is terminally ill and will not be, sadly, able to contribute anything to society. Thus it seems to me in this case that the hospital may indeed have the right to discontinue treatment.

If the parents are able to find someplace that will continue to keep the child on life support, then I hope they consider what their child has become and perhaps they may decide it more dignified to allow him to rest in peace.

Inhuman Killer's Justice is Denied

Perhaps a better way to execute this guy would be to chop his head off. Justice must be served on this guy, if not lethal injection then what? Maybe he could choose the method of his own execution. Yeah, give each person to be executed a choice... hanging, beheading, or lethal injection. Which would you choose?

U.S. Supreme Court blocks execution of inmate who scattered victim's remains

ERICA RYAN Associated Press Writer

(AP) - LUCASVILLE, Ohio-The U.S. Supreme Court blocked the execution of a man who had been scheduled to die for killing a woman in 1991 and scattering her remains across two states.

Kenneth Biros - and the family of the victim, Tami Engstrom - had waited for the decision more than six hours past his scheduled execution time Tuesday. When told of the ruling, Biros' mother clasped his hands through the bars of his cell and he thanked God, said defense attorney John P. Parker.

The justices' one-sentence decision agreed with two lower courts that delayed the execution so he could continue arguing that Ohio's method of lethal injection is cruel and unusual punishment. The 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals refused earlier Tuesday to allow a hearing before the full court to consider the state's appeal.

"To put these poor people through that is just not right," defense attorney Timothy Sweeney said of Biros and his family.

Prisons director Terry Collins said the state planned to move Biros out of the death house shortly after the ruling came.

Biros, 48, acknowledged that he killed Engstrom, 22, but said he did it during a drunken rage.

They met after work in 1991 at a tavern. Police believed she fled his advances and fell or was struck or strangled when Biros tried to quiet her. An autopsy found several beating and stab wounds before her death, and the coroner said she was stabbed five times immediately afterward and dismembered within minutes.

Engstrom's head, right breast and right leg had been severed. Intestines were found in a swampy area in Ohio, and the torso was found in a rural area of Pennsylvania. Part of a liver was found in Biros' car.

Engstrom's sister, Debi Heiss, 41, had said previously that the delay had been hard on her family. She said after the execution was called off that she was too upset to talk.

State Attorney General Marc Dann said he would renew his efforts to have the sentence carried out.

Get Gonzales Gone

White House enveloped in deepening federal prosecutors' probe as attorney general fights for his job

In my opinion, Gonzales should be fired for being stupid enough fire all those people at the same time, and not think that people would look into why. They tacked on a couple more people who may have been needing to get fired, but the San Diego US Atty is the one that really makes the firings odorous since their supposed reason of not enough immigration prosecutions is like firing a cop for not writing enough parking tickets while he's been busy catching murderers or effectively stopping gang violence. She was busy catching some pretty corrupt people, it doesn't matter which party they belong to because it's something that needs to be prosecuted to ensure that our political system remains fair to all.

It's just absurd. It's stupid beyond belief and maybe that's an indicator how much pressure was put on Gonzales, because nobody gets to his position being that stupid. Only Rove would have the gall and arrogance to push it to that point thinking there would be no consequences. This should make you wonder what all he's gotten away with to think that way.

I think Gonzales should not have allowed the firings. If the White House, Bush, threatened him with either going along with or getting fired, Gonzales should have chosen to get fired, which would have been pretty risky for Bush because doing so would show him to be directly within the loop of what was going on and why. You'd think after DeLay and the other corruption cases that Bush and Co. would tread a little more carefully in DC's current culture of corruption... but no.

I can tell it's going to be a choice of which evils can you live with in the next Presidential election. Right now I don't like any of the front-runners. For instance, McCain. I like him on most all issues, but any candidate who wants to impose their personal religious belief on people, most of whom disagree, then there's something wrong with that. I have no desire for America to become a theocracy, which Republican candidates in general seem to wink at.

And I have no desire to see the US lose in any military conflict, which Democrats appear to not understand. Yes, everyone wants us out of Iraq, but not until we WIN first. I just don't think Democrats really understand the people they claim to speak for, maybe because they're too poll driven.

NEway, politics right now is pretty scary no matter which party you choose. And this Gonzales debacle is just another instance showing how even our system of government can fail.